Bowser's Castle
by Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus
Summary: Bowser's Castle is a fiery, mechanical nightmare of all different sorts. Of course, there's many Bowser Castles all over the world, but that's because Bowser love to show off himself. He is a big egotistical ruler of turtles and mutated fungus, after all.
1. Bowser Never Learns

**Bowser's Castle  
**

**By Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus**

"_Gwa ha ha ha!_" Bowser laughed as he was enormous, chasing Mario in the hot, boiling magma of his castle as he swiped his claws at the small, red capped plumber. "I'm going to get you good, Mario!"

"I don't think-a so-a!" Mario exclaimed as he jumped from yellow platform to platform, managing to dodge Bowser's claw swips as he stuck his tongue out back at the massive Koopa King.

Bowser Junior and Kamek were both watching the platforming action from a balcony, watching as Bowser began spewing hot yellow fireballs at Mario, who kept dodging them with ease.

"How come papa just doesn't install traps to prevent Mario from progressing?" Bowser Jr. asked Kamek as he bounced about.

Kamek sighed as he frowned, shaking his head as he turned to Bowser Jr. "Oh, Junior, it's because your father is a big too pig headed to actually try and think. He rather just crush Mario instead of actually planning things out."

"Typical." Dry Bowser commented, being behind Bowser Jr. and Kamek as his skeletal arms were crossed.

"How long have you been here?" Kamek asked Dry Bowser, lowering his glasses as he faced the skeletal Koopa.

Dry Bowser sighed as he shook his skeletal head. "I have been here long enough to see how embarrassing my living relative is doing. He somehow still thinks being huge would actually help him beat Mario."

The three reptiles turned their attention back to the platforming, with Bowser screaming as he was sent down the giant pit along with all the red lava, with Mario being triumphant as usual, standing on top of the kill switch. Dry Bowser rolled his eyes while Kamek sighed in disappointment, Bowser Jr. placing his left hand on his face.

"Oh dad... why do you have to be such a failure...?" Bowser Jr. muttered in disapointment as he watched Mario proudly march through the rest of Bowser's Castle, coming face to face with a False Bowser, who was even less intimidating than the real one.


	2. Clones Of Mario

A Bone Piranha Plant popped his head out of the grayish warp pipe, calling out to a nearby Dry Bones. "Hey, random skeleton koopa!"

The Dry Bones turned his head to the Bone Piranha Plant as he folded his skeletal arms together. "Hey. What's up, plant?"

"Did you noticed that there's a lot of Mario clones running around here?" The Bone Piranha Plant commented as he bobbed up and down.

The Dry Bones squinted his eyes as he placed his skeletal hands on his skeletal hips. "Mario clones? What are you talking about?"

The Bone Piranha Plant then pointed at the platforms across them, with several Marios running around as they got hit by rogue red fireballs, collided into waddling Bone Goombas, squashed by giant gray Thwomps, or accidentally falling into the red molten magma below.

The Dry Bones turned his head to the Bone Piranha Plant as he tilted his head to the right. "Oh. Those Mario clones."

"Double Cherries." The Bone Piranha Plant added as he kept speaking to the Dry Bones, watching more Marios fall, run, or get squashed to their deaths. "The power up where you can make your own clone. Or clones, if you wish."

"Who's the freak of nature who invented them?" The Dry Bones asked as the Bone Piranha Plant simply shrugged in response, with the cries of the various Marios echoing within the fiery interior of Bowser's Castle.


	3. A Rivalry Within The Fiery DS BC

Bowser laughed as he passed Donkey Kong on the DS Bowser's Castle, with R.O.B. in the lead as only four racers were on the track. Waluigi was in the back, with Waluigi chucking a Blue Shell as it zipped around the course, blasting R.O.B. and causing him to fall into the red magma below.

"I'm going to overtake you, Bowser!" Donkey Kong exclaimed as he chucked a green shell at Bowser.

"Argh! Damn you, stubborn ape!" Bowser growled, trying to get back his lost speed as he quickly used a Mushroom he held within his Koopa Klown Kar based kart, speeding up and pushing Donkey Kong into the lava as Bowser laughed heartily.

Kamek was watching the race from high in the sky on his broomstick, shaking his head as he watched R.O.B. win the race, with Bowser staying on the upper path as Donkey Kong and Waluigi fought for third place.

"Oh... I wonder why I keep bothering to try and join these stupid races," Kamek complained as he sighed, flying to one of the other Bowser Castles populating the Koopa Kingdom.


	4. Bowser Jr Kidnapped Birdo

Bowser's Castle was quite a place to be. Whether it was to be adventuring, or simply racing all over it, the fiery domain of Bowser was definitely a place where you would want to keep your focus, as anything and everything could happen at every turn...

"Give up, you pesky plumbers!" Bowser Junior laughed as he was riding in his Koopa Klown Kar, having Birdo in his possession. "You'll never get back Birdo!"

Mario growled as he shook his right fist at the young Koopaling. "Grr! You let-a her go, you risky rascal!"

"Y-yeah!" Luigi reluctantly added as he moved his hands around. "Birdo's completely innocent! She hasn't got anything that you would want!"

"Oh, but she does!" Bowser Jr. laughed as he rubbed his hands together, glancing at Birdo. "She has more intelligence than any female in the Mushroom Kingdom! That makes her a worthy target for my new experiment!"

Birdo sighed in annoyance as she closed her eyes, folding her arms together, the rest of her body being tied up in rope. "Why did I agree to help out you in your little experiment again...?"

"Because you had pity from my act as a desperate child," Bowser Jr. commented with a smirk as he waggled his right index finger at Birdo. "Turns out I'm more clever than you!"

Mario and Luigi both jumped at Bowser Jr., but Junior easily blasted them with two homing purple Bullet Bills, causing the Mario Brothers to fall in the boiling hot red magma below. Bowser Jr. laughed as he watched Mario and Luigi bounce in the fire in flames, with Birdo rolling her eyes as she knew it was going to be a pretty long night.


	5. Bowser and Dry Bowser Talk

Dry Bowser was at the tailgate end of one of the various Bowser's Castle, enjoying some hot french fries he made himself as he watched Bowser fall into the red molten magma yet again, with Mario and a random yellow colored Toad running into the dungeon to rescue Princess Peach Toadstool. Bowser emerged out of the lava after his defeat, sighing as he got out, joining Dry Bowser on the arch overlooking the entire platforming level.

"Damn it. I need to formulate better ways of getting that pesky plumber and his stupid mushroom pal that no one cares about," Bowser grumbled as he folded his burly arms together, shaking his head.

Dry Bowser chuckled as he ate a couple of more fries. "Maybe you should stop kidnapping Peach for once. It ought to be a nice change of pace, wouldn't you say?"

Bowser growled as he eyed Dry Bowser, shaking his right fist at the skeletal reptile. "Hey, snatching Peach is my calling in life, okay? It's just not right if I don't do it!"

Dry Bowser closed his eyes as he took a deep sigh, shaking his head. "It seems that Nintendo's lazy, cashed in rehashing has finally gotten to your mind..."

Bowser scoffed as he folded his arms, turning his head to the right. "Well maybe it has, but I'm not gonna let that stop me from trying to beat Mario and have Peach for myself!"

Dry Bowser rolled his eyes as he kept on eating his fries. "Whatever floats your boat, weirdo."

"_I'm the weirdo!?_" Bowser growled as he punched Dry Bowser in the face with his right fist, knocking Dry Bowser's head off his skeletal body. "You're the one eating french fries and not doing anything!"

Dry Bowser smirked as he faced Bowser. "I simply choose to not do anything. I've done more things than you could possibly imagine." He then placed his head back on his skeletal body, continuing to munch on his fries as Bowser grumbled in response, trying to think of yet another way of kidnapping Peach yet again.


	6. Two Thwomps Talk

Bowser's Castle was full of strange inactive activity as two gray colored Thwomps were chilling with each other in the burning interior.

"So, seen any good guys to smash?" The first, male Thwomp commented.

The second, female Thwomp sighed as she lowered her eyes. "No. Not much new stuff going on."

"I didn't say stuff. I said guys to smash." The male Thwomp corrected.

The female Thwomp blinked as she eyed the male Thwomp. "There hasn't been many guys to smash. It's been quite all day and all night here for weeks."

"True. I guess that's a good point." The male Thwomp remarked.

"See? Do you understand what I mean?" The female Thwomp asked.

Suddenly, much to the surprise of both Thwomps, Opa Opa came zipping through the castle, leaving the Thwomps surprised as they slammed down, only to completely miss the sentient vehicle.

"_D'oh!_" The male Thwomp cursed out. "We missed! Uwah!"

"Oh no..." The female Thwomp gulped. "Lord Bowser is going to reduce us to rubble when he finds out that we didn't squish this intruder..."


	7. A Horror So Scary It's Too Much To Say

It was quite a quiet night at Bowser's Castle...

...except it wasn't, because all of the enemies were on the run.

Not from Mario, no.

Not even from Luigi.

No, they were on the run from a threat so dreaded, it could make anyone cry.

They,

the enemies,

were on the run,

from...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...a floating shopping list.

"_Oh My Gosh!_" Toad exclaimed in his cage as he noticed a piece of paper with the words 'Milk', 'Eggs', and 'Cheese' printed on it chasing the enemies up and down and all around the barely lit hallways of Bowser's Castle, screaming as he placed his hands on his face. "**Ahhh!**"

Princess Peach Toadstool farted in fright as she screamed alongside Toad, with Bowser groaning as he woke up, emerging out of his bedroom, the cages holding the princess and mushroom retainer being just outside.

"_**Hey!**_ Settle down!" Bowser growled as he turned to Toad and Peach, shaking his head as he pointed at Toad with his left index finger. "I expect you to wet yourself from even the tiniest crumb just like that green loser, Luigi," He then pointed at Peach with his right index finger. "And I expect you to let loose your fart factory at any given time. But what's the commotion this time?"

"Take a gander yourself, lizard lips." Dry Bowser commented to his living counterpart as he was collecting red coins within Bowser's Castle, catching Bowser's attention.

Bowser turned to Dry Bowser, who pointed at Bowser's army running in flee from the floating shopping list. Bowser placed his hands on his scaly hip in confusion as he watched the floating shopping list continue to chase after the enemies, with both Toad and Peach crying in fear. Bowser shook his head as he rolled his eyes, heading back into his bedroom.

"Gwar, never mind. Just keep down the noise!" Bowser bellowed as he slammed his bedroom door shut.

Dry Bowser rolled his eyes as Toad and Peach continued being frightened, the floating shopping list managing to catch up with Bowser's army and making half of them instantly vanish into thin air, some of them turning into yellow coins.


	8. Lava, Lava, Lava

Bowser watched as the red, molten magma was flowing through the crevices of his gigantic castle, the burly King of the Koopas chuckling as he folded his yellow arms together.

"This is good... the lava is flowing exactly the way I like it." Bowser remarked as he watched several bright yellow fireballs bouncing out of the magma. "It's good to see that the fiery mood is still prevalent years after they were formed."

"Well, to be fair your highness," Kamek commented as he swooped down, floating next to Bowser. "Lava has been around on this planet before any of us were even a concept."

Bowser turned to Kamek as he rolled his right hand. "So it's the case. Anyway, where is that pesky plumber Mario, and his trio of morons?"

Kamek sighed as he shook his head. "They're... having some difficulties reaching here, my lord..."

* * *

Somewhere within the lava filled hallways of Bowser's Castle, Mario and Luigi were trying to avoid being pushed into the magma by the two generic Toads, with the Blue Toad in particular acting like a complete jerk as the Yellow Toad was messing up everything. The various enemies were watching as they looked at each other, shaking their head as they didn't even have to do anything.


	9. Sonic Booms Through

Bowser's Castle was burning as usual, with Mario and Sonic The Hedgehog zipping through the castle in an attempt to see who was better at navigating the fiery homestead of Bowser. However, as Sonic went through a giant gray warp pipe, Mario stopped in his tracks, a giant blue square shaped Thwomp landing in front of it.

"URGH!" The Thwomp exclaimed as he glared at Mario.

"Mamma mia!" Mario exclaimed as he backed away, raising his hands in shock as he shook his head, blinking.

It was then that Bowser appeared in his Koopa Klown Kar, laughing at Mario as he pointed at the red capped plumber. "Bwahaha! Stumped, Mario? I have been placing these old 64 styled Thwomps back into my castle!"

Mario rolled his eyes as he folded his arms together, sighing. "Yes... I noticed..."

All of a sudden, making for a surprise return, Sonic kicked his way right through the Thwomp, breaking it in peaces as the blue hedgehog landed on his feet, standing up. Mario and Bowser gasped as they noticed that Sonic was taller, and had a brown scarf around his neck.

"What?" Sonic asked as he rolled his right hand around, his voice slightly deeper pitched.

Mario shook his head as he opened his arms out. "Sonic... what happened to you in there?"

Sonic glanced up at the shocked Bowser, chuckling as he turned to Mario, wrapping his blue, lanky arms around the back of his head. "Oh. I just had a Sonic Boom, that's all."

Bowser blinked as he shook his head, piloting his Koopa Klown Kar to the northern direction. "That's it, I'm out of here."


End file.
